Stupid Things I Did This Month #1

By: Jacob Pickle
 Merriam-Webster’s Dictionary defines the word “stupid” as “given to unintelligent decisions or acts: acting in an unintelligent or careless manner,” or “lacking intelligence or reason.” While these definitions will more than likely apply to at least a few of the things I’ll talk about in this blog, I think the connotation behind the word “stupid” can be misleading. Not everything that’s stupid refers to someone acting unintelligent or in a careless manner. A joke could be stupid funny. An adventure could be stupid cool. Some academic English professor might say that I’m just using stupid in place of other words that might better fit the context and sentences, but this isn’t an English paper and I’m certainly no English major. So, to best distinguish the various ways I’ll use the word “stupid” to describe my various excellent adventures, I’ve created a three-part classification system.
Classifications of Stupidity:
A.    Class A
Adventurous stupid. Things under this class are probably a little ill-advised but end up with a funny story without any major consequences. Might be used as “stupid crazy.” When you read these, you’ll probably say “Jacob, why would you do that?”

B.    Class B
Funny stupid. Overly ridiculous, dramatic, over the top. I’m personally a fiend for pomp and circumstance for pomp and circumstance’s sake, so this section will probably be filled pretty consistently.

C.    Class C
Actually stupid. I tend to get myself into situations that the average reasonable person would not get themselves into. However, my mindset with these things has always been this: If you get yourself into stupid situations, you better be able to get yourself out of them. That is my specialty. I also can be very absent minded sometimes, so these stupid things will also fall into this class.
Now that we’re on the same page of how this blog will work, and you have a little bit of an idea of what kind of things you’ll read about in this blog, let’s get into what you’ve all been waiting for: What stupid things did I do this month?

For our first stupid things of the month, we’ll delve into a few Class C stupid things I’ve done. As a resident of Ridgecrest South, I like to park on the third floor of the parking garage as close as I can get to the back door to the stairwell, so I don’t have to walk as much up to the fourth floor. However, that has become challenging since many people brought back cars after winter break and spots in the parking deck have been harder and harder to come by. My parking routines have been messed up, and I’ve had to walk up and down all three levels of the parking deck at least three times to find my car. Painful, to say the least. Another one of these Class C stupid things I did this month was trying to get to a class in Russell Hall, when the class was actually in North Lawn. As I walked by Denny Chimes, I decided to check to see which room in Russell my class was in only to find that I had to walk all the way to North Lawn. I was twenty minutes late.
The other class we’ll mention this month is none other than Class B stupidity, and where this is concerned, there is only one thing worth mentioning: The Butler Field Classic. The Butler Field Classic, otherwise known as the “greatest game never televised,” is a beautiful backyard football league played on the turf band practice field. Its origin story is one of funny stupidity which has blossomed into a wonderful league full of needless pomp and circumstance. Last semester after Thursday Freshman family groups, some guys from my family group and another family group started regularly playing football out at Butler Field for hours on end. The last game of the semester finished with a score of 94-87 in double Overtime, easily earning its place as an ESPN Instant Classic. From there on, the founding members of the game decided to start a player draft with two set teams for the semester to add to the continuity of the game. Now, the league is home to over 30 players and 4 teams: The Fighting Lee Corsos, Braxton Barker Club, Leach’s Pirates, and the Slim Reapers. I won’t claim to take any kind of credit for most of the leg work of the league, but the part I’ve been able to play in founding the largest unofficial intramural league on campus has been one I’ll be forever grateful for. Follow the events of the season @ButlerFieldClassic on Instagram.
Overall, I hope you enjoy the blogs to come detailing the many peculiar scenarios and mindless mistakes that my life at the University of Alabama often lead to. There are sure to be many, many more of these silly stories to come. Stay tuned as an active reader to see where this college life takes me next. Roll Tide, and God Bless.

No Comments