Stupid Things I Did This Month #2
A Shorter Month, A Longer List of Stupidity
By: Jacob Pickle
Greetings to all the loyal readers of this blog. I hope you’ve had a wonderful month of February.
You might say, “Jacob, you only had 28 days this month. There’s no way you did that much stupid stuff in a month.” I’m here to unequivocally tell you I most definitely found the time to compile a substantial list of stupid acts for all three of our stupidity classifications.
Let’s start with our Class C acts of the month, the actually stupid ones. Last Wednesday, I found myself in dire need of some lovely Zaxby’s chicken tenders dipped in their beautifully tangy and sweet Zax sauce. In my dire need, I was in quite a hurry to make the long trek to the Northport location via Highway 82 and the Woosley-Finnell Bridge. It seems that in this hurry, I forgot my wallet. I did not realize I did not possess such payment until I was at the window to pay. I asked to come in and do Apple Pay with my phone, and they said this would work. But, once I ran through the pouring rain inside to try to pay this way, they turned me away and told me to come back with my debit card. After four treks through the pounding rain in 30-degree weather, I finally procured the magnificence that is Zaxby’s Wings and Things. My own forgetfulness genuinely never ceases to amaze me.
Here’s a few other notable Class C acts of the month:
· Drove with my head out the window in 25-degree weather so I could see since my windshield was frozen and the defroster wasn’t working
· Didn’t do laundry for three weeks and had to spend $15 in Bama Cash on five loads of laundry
Now onto our Class B stupid things of the month. Admittedly, this section was a little lacking this month. My over the topness mainly took place this month during the two snow days of the month. Now, being a Florida boy, I have scarcely been able to partake in the incredible event that is a snow day. Hurricane days, I’ve had plenty. Rainouts, too many to count. But snow days have never happened for me. As soon as the temperature dropped below freezing, I ran outside to see my first snow fall. I was entranced. I forced all of my friends to come outside and make the tiniest snowballs with me and romp around in the half inch of snow. Once the initial thrill of the snow and sliding around on the icy sidewalks faded, the cold set in. I frantically sprinted down the frozen tundra of the hill behind John England towards the Lakeside lake. I was so desperate for warmth for my hands that I stuck my hands in the Lakeside lake. The epitome of down bad. I learned through my naivete that while snow may be fun to play in, it is frozen when it comes down to it. Regardless, I had a great time seeing my first snow with my friends.
Finally, we reach our Class A level of stupid things of the month. As many of you know, Alabama basketball had an away game at the University of Oklahoma on a Saturday. Two of my friends and I saw this game on the schedule back in November and realized that this game was a must see. So, we bought tickets for $12 a piece and lined up a place to stay in Fort Worth, Texas. The whole trip was a blast. I got to see Texas and Oklahoma for the first time and did all of the stereotypical Texas things: ate at a steakhouse, rode a (mechanical) bull, went to the Cowboys stadium, and established a deep seeded superiority complex for the state of Texas. We also got to go into the TCU football stadium and one of the press boxes. Not quite sure how it happened, but sometimes doors (and gates) open themselves for you. For the basketball game itself, we had a blast. The game was stressful, and the close, late game loss definitely hurt. With the 30 hours of driving in a 56-hour round trip coupled with the loss, it might seem like the trip wasn’t quite worth the drives through the night. Often times, when we step out in adventure even if it’s ill-advised, you make memories that will last a lifetime.
Thank y’all for tuning in again to my monthly recap of my stupidity. Stay tuned for what the stupid memories to come from my trip to New Orleans in March.
You might say, “Jacob, you only had 28 days this month. There’s no way you did that much stupid stuff in a month.” I’m here to unequivocally tell you I most definitely found the time to compile a substantial list of stupid acts for all three of our stupidity classifications.
Let’s start with our Class C acts of the month, the actually stupid ones. Last Wednesday, I found myself in dire need of some lovely Zaxby’s chicken tenders dipped in their beautifully tangy and sweet Zax sauce. In my dire need, I was in quite a hurry to make the long trek to the Northport location via Highway 82 and the Woosley-Finnell Bridge. It seems that in this hurry, I forgot my wallet. I did not realize I did not possess such payment until I was at the window to pay. I asked to come in and do Apple Pay with my phone, and they said this would work. But, once I ran through the pouring rain inside to try to pay this way, they turned me away and told me to come back with my debit card. After four treks through the pounding rain in 30-degree weather, I finally procured the magnificence that is Zaxby’s Wings and Things. My own forgetfulness genuinely never ceases to amaze me.
Here’s a few other notable Class C acts of the month:
· Drove with my head out the window in 25-degree weather so I could see since my windshield was frozen and the defroster wasn’t working
· Didn’t do laundry for three weeks and had to spend $15 in Bama Cash on five loads of laundry
Now onto our Class B stupid things of the month. Admittedly, this section was a little lacking this month. My over the topness mainly took place this month during the two snow days of the month. Now, being a Florida boy, I have scarcely been able to partake in the incredible event that is a snow day. Hurricane days, I’ve had plenty. Rainouts, too many to count. But snow days have never happened for me. As soon as the temperature dropped below freezing, I ran outside to see my first snow fall. I was entranced. I forced all of my friends to come outside and make the tiniest snowballs with me and romp around in the half inch of snow. Once the initial thrill of the snow and sliding around on the icy sidewalks faded, the cold set in. I frantically sprinted down the frozen tundra of the hill behind John England towards the Lakeside lake. I was so desperate for warmth for my hands that I stuck my hands in the Lakeside lake. The epitome of down bad. I learned through my naivete that while snow may be fun to play in, it is frozen when it comes down to it. Regardless, I had a great time seeing my first snow with my friends.
Finally, we reach our Class A level of stupid things of the month. As many of you know, Alabama basketball had an away game at the University of Oklahoma on a Saturday. Two of my friends and I saw this game on the schedule back in November and realized that this game was a must see. So, we bought tickets for $12 a piece and lined up a place to stay in Fort Worth, Texas. The whole trip was a blast. I got to see Texas and Oklahoma for the first time and did all of the stereotypical Texas things: ate at a steakhouse, rode a (mechanical) bull, went to the Cowboys stadium, and established a deep seeded superiority complex for the state of Texas. We also got to go into the TCU football stadium and one of the press boxes. Not quite sure how it happened, but sometimes doors (and gates) open themselves for you. For the basketball game itself, we had a blast. The game was stressful, and the close, late game loss definitely hurt. With the 30 hours of driving in a 56-hour round trip coupled with the loss, it might seem like the trip wasn’t quite worth the drives through the night. Often times, when we step out in adventure even if it’s ill-advised, you make memories that will last a lifetime.
Thank y’all for tuning in again to my monthly recap of my stupidity. Stay tuned for what the stupid memories to come from my trip to New Orleans in March.
Recent
Archive
2021
January
February
March
2020
March
April
No Comments